The lines between stags, cucks, and hardcore cuckolds get blurred all of the time. It’s a very popular term now, and with so much information online, it can be hard to differentiate and really understand which box you fall into.
As a couple who have been part of this lifestyle for over 10 years and have helped tens of thousands of couples safely and confidently embark on this journey, we have developed a good understanding of the different terms and why they don’t really matter.
However, we still wanted to create this so that you can see what each means and get some well-needed guidance on where you fall and which term you should acknowledge. Some people like this information so they can accurately describe their desires, others wear it as a badge of honour, and others just like to understand a little more about this way of life.
So, let’s officially find out if you are a cuckold or a stag, or, surprisingly, maybe you’ll find out that you’re neither?
Before We Begin: We personally (on our website and inside our members area) usually put both stag and cuckold under the same umbrella and separate the more hardcore elements under ‘hardcore’ or ‘bi’ if they cross into that, for us if you’re into seeing your wife with other men, you’re into cuckolding, you just might not be into all aspects of it which is the case for most people.
We say this so that some of the more casual stags who see the word ‘cuckold’ thrown around aren’t put off by it. We cater to every type of stag, cuckold, husband, boyfriend, wife, girlfriend, hotwife, swinger, or just curious normies who like to explore themselves.
Consider taking this free cuckold quiz to learn more about the term and what it means to you.
What Does It Mean To Be A Stag In The Mainstream
In short, and by mainstream definitions, being a stag is a little different from being a cuckold. A stag is a boyfriend or husband who isn’t disrespected or humiliated (unlike some cuckolds); a stag encourages his wife to have sex with others, either in his presence or alone. A stag possesses 100% of the power, shares it with his wife, and remains in control.
We asked 241 stags what it was that made them tick and what they enjoyed about being a stag in this lifestyle, and these are some of their best responses.
241 Stags Told Us What They Enjoyed Most About Being A Stag:
- The idea of their wife being with another man.
- Joining your partner in threesomes, foursomes, with other couples.
- Sharing your wife with other men in mfm threesomes.
- Hearing stories about past hookups, exes, and hot past stories.
- You encourage your wife to lean into her promiscuous/slutty/sensual side.
- Watching homemade porm videos or receiving pictures of your wife with different male partners.
- Supporting your wife and encouraging her to sleep around.
- Exhibitionism.
- Other men are attracted to your wife, but she’s all yours.
- Other men are trying it on with your wife.
- Everyone is playing by your rules; no going off-script for partners or your wife’s lovers.
- Picking lovers for your wife.
- Having full veto on any dates, lovers, and sexual arrangements.
- You are in control and help with planning, where the date will be, and the times it will end.
- More sex, better sex, and kinkier sex.
- You get to watch and join in whenever you want.
- Your relationship feels stronger from so many new adventures and seeing your wife in a new light.
- You feel like a new couple all over again.
There are some hugely positive things to be said about being a stag and all of the subjects were glowing as they discussed and showed us what this definition meant to them and how it affected what they get up too, however, as with everything it does come with some negatives and below were the most frequent things our pool of 241 stags mentioned they disliked and didn’t associate with the term.
The 241 stags we asked didn’t/don’t enjoy these things about being a stag:
- Humiliation. Only a small portion of them enjoyed being humiliated or left out purposefully.
- Their wives having a boyfriend/s was a big no-no.
- Their wives giving attention and affection that isn’t sexual to other men was widely declined.
- Cleaning up was something a lot of our stags would never consider.
- Having another man purposefully cum on them was also a huge no-no.
- Fluffing and other bi aspects of cuckolding were something most of our stags didn’t consider.
- Reclaiming your wife after she’s been creampied is something a small majority of our stags we asked liked.
- Submission to your wife was not considered something our stags enjoyed.
- Submission to your wife’s bull was even more widely denied.
- Chastity was something only a handful of stags wanted.
- Being disrespected was also a major no across the board.
Being a stag whilst it is sharing your wife with others is a little different from being a cuckold, as we will learn below. Stags prefer joining in, having fun, experiencing things alongside their wives, and having full control.
What It Means To Be A Cuck/Cuckold In The Mainstream
A cuckold, by mainstream definition, is a man whose wife is unfaithful, sleeps with other men, and the cuckold will either be unaware or allowed to watch his wife with another man. Cuckolds usually enjoy humiliation, disrespect, and feeling out of control.
As well as asking 241 stags for their opinion, we of course asked 241 cuckolds the same thing: what do they like about it, and what does it mean to you? Our cucks couldn’t wait to share their answers, and below were the most frequent and popular things that kept popping up.
241 Cucks Told Us What Defines Them As A Cuckold And What They Like About It:
- Being able to reclaim your wife.
- Not being there or involved in the sex.
- The power exchange between your wife and you.
- The domination of another man fucking your wife better than you can.
- Being submissive to other men.
- Getting put in your place by your wife’s bull.
- Feeling sexually inadequate.
- Most cucks enjoyed their wife actively putting their own sexual needs first and neglecting theirs.
- Feeling like you can’t please your wife, so you need someone else to do it.
- Not being able to make your wife cum, so you have to get someone else to.
- Enjoying new sexual scenarios and kinks.
- Their wife giving other men more than she gives them, i.e., you’ve never had anal sex, but she let her first hook up fuck her ass.
- The idea of your wife cheating or being unfaithful.
- Cleaning up another man’s cum.
- Their wife pushing boundaries made a lot of our cucks very happy.
- Fluffing or learning to fluff your wife’s bull.
- Being made sexless or sex being withheld or given to another man.
- Other men are dismissing you and trying to fuck your wife.
- Chastity and being locked up in a cock cage, maybe as a threat from your wife or her bull.
- Being disrespected.
- Being degraded
- Being sidelined.
We Don’t Agree With These General Cuck/Stag Meanings
When we first joined this lifestyle many years ago, being a cuckold simply meant you just enjoyed watching your wife have sex with other men; you were a voyeur, maybe you sat on a chair while your wife played with others, and you just watched, but it could also mean you enjoy humiliation, cleaning up, reclaiming, and bi-play. It varied by person.
In the last 6 years or so, there’s been a massive number of couples and solo men and women joining this lifestyle, and that has caused a little separation between being a cuckold or a stag.
Is this because some see the word cuckold as a bad thing and want to be distanced from the humiliation and bi aspects of hardcore cuckolding?
Is it because ‘cuckold’ is too broad and can mean many things?
I personally see no negative in whatever you decide to choose and whatever label you give yourself.
That’s why we labeled these two definitions as ‘the mainstream’ because to us, you could be a cuckold who just enjoys seeing your partner have sex with different men, you could also be a stag who enjoys reclaiming his wife after she’s been with others, you could also switch as your time in this lifestyle goes on and you see what parts you enjoy and which don’t serve you.
Inside our members’ area and on this blog, we have thousands of users who see themselves as cuckolds who just enjoy seeing their wife with another man, or with someone who is well-endowed, even just seeing their wife reach her sexual prime.
We also have lots that enjoy cleaning up, but no other bi play, and then some love all elements and enjoy cleaning up, small dick humiliation, bi play, and doing anything they can to please their wife, even if that means going sex free.
What Do We Prefer Instead?
Just working out what you enjoy from this lifestlye along with your other enjoyments, kinks and fetishes and telling your partner that, you don’t need to call yourself anything, you are just someone who is into this (enter your kinks) and not into (enter your turn offs), there’s no need to put yourself into a box the kink is too broad to be so general
So, Are You A Stag or Cuck?
That depends on you, how much you care about labels, and which definition of cuckold or stag you fall into. If you’re into the more humiliating aspects of this lifestyle, like being left out, enjoy the control of leaving your hands, you could place yourself into the cuckold category.
If, on the other hand, you enjoy your wife being with other people, you like to get involved, you like being in control, and you don’t really want to be humiliated or disrespected, you could say being a stag fits your nametag better.
If neither of these definitions really appeals to you, you could fit somewhere neatly in the middle, and that’s perfectly okay, too.
Is Jack (the co-owner of Cuckin) a stag or a cuckold?
Jack changes depending on the mood, the scenario, the setting, and the people. It’s why we feel so strongly about labels not really mattering. If he had to be put in a box, I would say he falls more into the cuckold definitions, but we are very open, very interchangeable, and very loose with our boundaries.
Let Us Know What You Think And What Box You Fall Into…
We would love to know what you think. Are we wrong? What do you relate to more? Do you think there should be any new terms? Or, should we all stick to the correct labels?
Let us know in the comments below, or get in touch.
